As I write these words, I’m in that phase of perimenopause, right before mens start, when curling up seems like the only option, though the cramping won’t let me rest. It feels like another dive on the hormonal roller coaster we ride through this transition.
A time to stand still, reflect, and rest. A counterintuitive invitation in a world that pushes productivity and constant doing.
While menopause is clinically defined as the end of menstruation, this space speaks to the full transition, including perimenopause, where the unraveling and the wisdom truly begin.
The real paradox is that the more we ignore the wisdom of our body, the louder the call becomes.
So come along with me into the wilderness of menopause.
I can’t say for sure when the waves of perimenopause started, but when the clock struck 45, the hands of time skipped to a new rhythm. One of the first changes was increased irritability and reactivity. I jokingly call this my Tourette’s phase, because everything I had repressed, everything I used to put up with, felt like it was hanging on my last nerve. I shifted from a people-pleasing servant to a truth warrior. This didn’t fare well with everyone, including me.
I was conflicted, teary-eyed, and confused. I began questioning many things, including the work I was doing as a psychiatric nurse. And as if the world were mirroring my inner unrest, the global health crisis hit. Around that same time, my periods became irregular.
Amid it all, my life turned upside down. I left a 20-year practice, reoriented my skills toward therapeutic support, sold my home, moved away from the city into an intergenerational household, supported my parents through declining health, and homeschooled my two younger children for several years.
Then the crash came.
When the adrenaline wore off, only the effects of prolonged cortisol remained: inflammation, aches, and pain. Everything became foggy. My once overachieving, multitasking brain started forgetting words mid-sentence. I wondered how I could possibly build a therapeutic support business in this state. No energy. No motivation. Some days, even cooking dinner felt like a feat.
Then came all the wacky menopause-related symptoms: significant weight gain, brittle hair, itchy ears. And like the shoemaker’s child going barefoot, all my training as a health practitioner couldn’t prepare me for the depth of this transition.
That being said, the holistic understanding of menopause is still an emerging field, one that remains under-resourced and under-recognized. When I came across a three-day summit on the subject, I made space for it. As I listened to these women, specialists in the field, I found myself crying—not out of despair, but because I felt seen, validated, and encouraged.
The wounded warrior, caretaker, and people-pleaser in me finally surrendered and turned inward. I began to listen. What unfolded through this unraveling, not unlike the hero’s journey, felt like an echo of ancestral wisdom—women walking the walk. I felt compelled to contribute to the legacy it carries.
This is why I created Menopause Manna: to honor women’s innate wisdom during menopause and to walk alongside them as they uncover the hidden treasures within this season.
Menopause has a way of stripping away what no longer fits and revealing what has been waiting underneath.
This is the space I call Manna in the Wilderness.
[Explore Manna in the Wilderness →]
Menopause Manna is a therapeutic space for women navigating perimenopause and menopause, rooted in body-based wisdom, psychological insight, and spiritual grounding.
Menopause Manna 